Oh uh... You Don't Want to Sit on That Stool...

So i'm sitting here, innocently at my dad's computer (it's running faster than mine and thus keeping me fitter) when curiosity gets the better of me and I see two paintbrushes. "Excellent!" I think as my teacher has told me that i'll be needing some for hand toning prints tomorrow at Uni. There are also two bright blue plastic bags underneath them. "What could they be for? Oh look, a set of instructions..."

Real all instructions before beginning:

SAMPLE 1 - Your first bowel movement

1- Take these instructions, Brush kit and Test Card into the bathroom.
Flush the toilet BEFORE your bowel movement.

2- After your bowel movement .DO NOT PLACED USED TOILET PAPER IN THE TOILET BOWL. Instead use one of the BLUE waste bags from the Brush kit envelope. DO NOT FLUSH THE TOILET.

3- Life the flap marked "life here for SAMPLE 1" on the test Card to uncover the small white square marked "SAMPLE 1"

4- Using one of the blue brushes swirl the brush in the toilet water around and above the stool.

5- Transfer the toilet WATER sample by placing the bristles of the brush on to the small white square on the Test Card and hold for 5 seconds.
DO NOT place any faeces on the Test card.

6- Close the flap back over SAMPLE 1 and stick it down using one of the barcode labels located on theback of this page. Throw the used blue brush in the bin.

SAMPLE 2- Your second sample must be from a different bowel movement.

"and soo.. do I repeat the first 6 steps??"



I wish you could see the picture for number four. Also, I wonder how many times someone's stuck the brush in the water and gone "aw shit. I got shit in it."
Would they go to the bathroom and clean it and come back? Would they smear that white square with poo and be done with it?

So many questions...


But it's for bowel cancer sooo. GOOD ON ONE OF MY FAMILY MEMBERS WHO I WILL NOT MENTION.